“The Good Ol’ Days of Jared Gutts— Before the SHTF”

From the September 2014 issue of Haute Fresh magazine:

For several weeks he dominated Heritageville’s Baxter District nightclub scene. A self-proclaimed successful businessman with both a piano bar and aquarium supply company, he lived as high on the hog as one could whilst still lodging in his parents’ basement. ‘Wine, women, and a song’ was a lifestyle he lived by.
  Now Jared Gutts has none.

  Though “Mr. H’s Piano Bar & Aquarium Supply” initially brought an amount of commerce to the sketchy Baxter District, clientele quickly began to wane, and repeated calls to police regarding violence and drunken behaviour on premises led to ASBO charges against Mr Gutts and several of his associates.
  And then police found the lab.
  Law enforcement officials stumbled upon a makeshift drug lab in the aquarium “rescue unit” repair shop of Mr Gutts’ supply store.
  “The place was a toxic dump,” said federal agent Namir Fergus. “We had to immediately call in the HazMat crew.”
  Drug enforcement analysts suspected Mr Gutts was attempting to manufacture heroin, methamphetamines, and possibly some “designer” drugs. Environmental analysts said materials found in the lab were both carcinogenic and radioactive.
  Investigators suspected Mr Gutts obtained the materials illicitly during his brief employment at the Orville Corporation, a multi-national conglomerate. Orville Corporation CEO Johnny Gutts, uncle of Jared Gutts, could not be reached for comment.
  Instead of seizing the nightclub, federal agents had the property condemned and environmental agencies say a Chernobyl-style containment dome built over the site is the safest and most feasible solution.
  In exchange for criminal charges being dropped against Jared Gutts, the Orville Corporation will be in charge of the design, construction, and installation of the new containment dome.
Mr Gutts still faces hefty fines.
  “Guess I won’t be playin’ much piano anymore,” sighed Jared Gutts. “Uncle Johnny’s pretty mad at me.”

UPDATE from the September 2021 issue of Haute Fresh:

Neighbourhood Briefs

The Orville Corporation will be holding a ribbon-cutting ceremony this month in the Baxter District as they unveil “Mr. H’s Containment Dome” on the former location of “Mr. H’s Piano Bar & Aquarium Supply.” The property was the site of a drug bust and toxic waste accident in 2014. Orville CEO Johnny Gutts will be on hand for dedications and nephew Jared Gutts will make an allocution statement.
  Local merchants are concerned that “the dome” will make Baxter even more of a joke than it has been. Johnny Gutts assured them that the Orville Corporation is hard at work on a PR campaign called the Baxter Image Rehabilitation Project (BIRP).
  Leave it to Orville to make the best of a bad situation. Stay tuned.