High Comfort 1228

Menko 21: Viktor Vorchat

Son of Curmudgeon MMI

Praise™ for a Happy New Year

Praise™ Foo Young is here for the festivities of the new year!
  The Orville Corporation has teamed the nutritional powerhouse of Praise,™ the New Food Substitute with traditional taste of rich Foo Young from the honourable Middle Kingdom!
  Savouriness and new traditions come together for you to prosper in the up and coming year! Flavours present that would make even General Tso blush with delight!

Menko 21: Programmable Rage

Menko 21: The Rust Elemental

Antipodes of Creation

White Tiger Pareidolia

Bullet Dodged, Part II

How could a girl miss
that which she’s never had?
young Ginia had deemed

It made a dash of sense
but came off as rather sad
the notion Pipo flemed

Yet her dreams amid the glistening gems
betrayed her frosty mien

But that spark therein she could not nurture
and died, what could have been

So it’s all the same, for father and gents
to her ends, they’re just the means

BBACBL Business Case Study: “Operation: Sexpot!”

Historically, a news organisation, whilst ostensibly a business when in a free market economy, knows deep down that the currency on which they survive is trust in the public’s eyes.
  When a group of soi-disant “businessmen” decide to buy out a local media organ, one would assume due diligence would be a priority. Debts, profit and loss statements, and community reputation might be examined. A position of potential political influence might outweigh a miserable economic forecast for the business itself.
  Gentle readers, allow us, as proverbial flies on the wall, to pay witness to the strategic acumen of these businessmen as they synergise their efforts to serve the public trust whilst maintaining a viable local business...

Merion Brakewright: “Let’s get some of those pretty salesgirls and set up a table down at the food court at Furley Square Mall and have them sell subscriptions!”

Warren Letcher: “We can make them wear those short skirts they look real good in.”

Iōnnēs Elias: “Flaunt it, and they will come!”

  Thank heavens their plan never reached the execution stage. It would have brought the ritual humiliation of the sales staff to a whole new level.
  Not that they would (or ever did), but these high-minded business leaders should heed the wise words of Tiki Prime:
“Without credibility, respect is impossible.”

Kenvil Marathoners at Scott Tower

A pall of dust churned up under the dry summer sun as dozens of feet set into motion around Scott Tower. The furley youth of Kenvil were there in their entirety -- Malinconico, Scarlatti, Chuckie and Sis, and the Josefska clan.
  The makeshift footrace began soon after the noon whistle blared in the distance. Few rules applied in the kids’ spontaneous game without the hectoring of hovering parents. They simply ran in wide circles around the sandlot’s tower.
  The initial dash became a spirited trot as participants realised this was a contest not of speed or distance, but of endurance. The sound of panting and sneakers chuffing through sand carried over the nonexistant breeze. One by one the kids eventually dropped out to collapse in the weeds gasping for breath.
  The race was down to Malinconico and one of the Josefska boys, around and around, jogging side by side. The brunt of a bleary sun wrenched sweat from the two trying to keep pace with each other. No one thought anything about “hydrating” in those days, though it is certain the cool waters of the bay were on both their minds, it being a mere four blocks away from this arid parcel.
  The young men slowed to a sluggish gait, and then soon to a stagger. Step by step, each’s sight drenched and blurred as a final footfall kicked up one last cloud of dust.
  Malinconico dropped to his knees in the rasping sand. Out of breath, Josefska wordlessly raised his arm in victory and then crumpled to the ground as well.
  The Kenvil youth cheered, seemingly not for a single victor, but in acknowledgement of their entente in the spirit of communal engagement.

  “Hip hip hoorah!”

Ashy Widow Saturday

Latrodectus geometricus?

Strawberry Iceberg: New for 2022

Come Ride with Mr Rhydderch

“Look nonchalant, lads...”

“I'll give y’all a ride to the city for your show. With my mirrored shades, Hawaiian shirt, and greasy comb-over, no one will suspect I’m carrying contraband at all. And I’m only driving the most unpretentious of cars -- a modest Chrysler LeBaron T-top.”

[Of course all of the above went unsaid.]

Andres: “He looks like an extra from Miami Vice.”
Stoddard: “Or James Cole running around the PHL airport.”

Quid posset ire iniuriam?

Hit the Dirt

Thanksgiving Eve MMXXI

Proiettore e Proiezionista

Today’s Ego-Affiliates are heavily invested in their own Image-Construct, especially in a social context where the distended ego co-opts a superego ruined by past Pères de Soja and other False Coaches.
  Quite the recipe for Toxic Empowerment.
  The soi-disant idealist’s lens is clouded by ignorance and ends up unknowingly reflecting back their self-loathing and impotence. Still hungry for meaning, they grasp at the handiest cause du jour.
  Sanctified by the rightness of their new barnstorm, Authentic Good People gather to unleash the Id of Good Intentions. Histrionics and hysterics ensue. Throw in some property damage and bloodshed and you herald in the Age of Dust.

  Pane, circhi... e specchi.

Media ni Yoru Sagi

Black Cat Gravy

Funk Malted Coagulant

Cue for the Visions: Sangriento y Contundente

“The baby sat in the grass in the heart of the city. Watching life go by before his eyes, he giggled as a grand smile grew on his face. It was too bad he did not see what was coming -- nor could most people...” [end excerpt]

Latter days of the Cold War cue music for a view from Fellini’s of the sloping lawn at San Felipe. The infantile spirit sees beyond any fin del mundo scenario and sways in slo-mo wonder at the universe he will inherit.

Cockscomb of Mfungu

Celosia spicata

Menko 21: Témoin des Horreurs

Embrace the Telescreen

It began innocently enough with an 11-inch black-&-white television sitting behind the bar at the corner tavern. It occasionally drew attention during conversational lulls, or when the batter smacked one into the outfield. No biggie. An aid in camaraderie, much like each man’s drink.
  But over the years as the TV screen grew in size, the conversations shortened. Telescreens began appearing in nicer establishments, competing with Grandmum’s attention over Sunday dinner. Banks now have them, nattering in the background behind tellers. Churches have hopped on the bandwagon with, of course, their own content. (Gotta take advantage of the human eye’s tendency to drift to any screen.)
  The conspiracy-minded will always whisper about Big Brother, but what’s the incentive when it’s all voluntary? Cheapo tech from Asia?   You know things are bad when couples on dates -- an ostensibly sociable if not romantic occasion -- resort to sharing a seat side by side (“date-sidling”) so both can face the telescreen rather than face each other in normal adult conversation.

  In Classic City, all this came naturally, being a uni town with scores of places to drink and turn off the brain from its studies. So eventually every spot got its telescreen.
  Even The Bogle Alehaus, Classic City’s lone UK-style pub, had a telescreen propped upon its antique mantelpiece. The discordant effect of age-old woodwork joined with plastic and electronics was as disconcerting as that chintzy glass pyramid in front of the Louvre. (Gauche, as it were.) Thankfully, the telescreen didn’t last long. Maybe somebody complained. Hopefully somebody complained.
  As well, Uncle Ernie went overboard at his place with not only six megascreens on the walls, but also a flatscreen at every table in the joint.
  “It’s a sports bar,” he nonchalantly sniffed.
  (Credit must be given to one Mr Mutta for never once allowing a telescreen to grace the inside of his own Brooklyn Café.)
  So okay -- two holdouts in a sea of taverns and eateries -- all with the Sacred Screen lording over pigeon-hearted patrons a-drooling. Those are not good numbers.
  Let’s just go to Mack’s. At least the patio there -- as dumpy as it has become -- stands free of any hovering televisual presence. Where adults can enjoy each others’ company with a convivial beverage, uninterrupted. Where friends can hold court regaling themselves with drink, without intrusion. Where…

  Oh, wait…

Johnny Gutts: “What I Know,” Part III

Orville Corporation CEO and Head Solutioniser Johnny Gutts made a brief foray into local public-access television on Heritageville’s Channel 13 recently for several weekly airings of monologues, interviews, and more monologues. Gutts’ unique on-air style was loved by some and criticised by others.
  “The Johnny Gutts Show” was suspended indefinitely whilst the Interplanetary Telecoms Union investigated charges against both Gutts and Orville after he was viewed promoting arms trafficking on air. A favourite segment has been his apothegmatic “What I Know” utterings, picked up from past interviews in Haute Fresh magazine.

Highlights:

“LEADERS OF INEPT and dying organisations tend to focus on the symbolic. No new logos for us!”

“I DON’T JUDGE a book by its cover. I judge the cover. And often I find it wanting.”

“THE THING ABOUT CLOWNS isn’t that people just hate them, it’s that people like to hate them. I learned this when I interned at a circus and I never looked back.”

“I DON’T LAUGH at things because they are funny. I laugh because they are absurd.”

“I OFTEN MAKE PEOPLE angry. But are they angry because I’m right or because I’m wrong? They won’t say.”

Kaskad av Räkskal

The Furley Frosh of Reid III (“Too Cool to Care”) in Party Animal mode took their behaviour a bit too far on a Stratum XIII Saturday. In their sodden antics they revert to atavistic form reminiscent of prawn feeders (similar to octopus and cuttlefish, albeit without the cerebral capacity) but act closest to the raucous, aerial defecating sea-mew.
  As for their decapod detritus, it all carelessly went out the window. This did not go over well with the bundled parkers below.
  The retributive Trashening of Reid III commenced that evening.

“It was revenge for Kaskad av Räkskal, and a lot of other things. And there was nothing that we could do about it. And we had to sit still and take it.”

Dynorama-360 of Lodge Quarters

Dusty book stacks and midgets with afros. A purple bear and wombat sit mutely upon the Electrophonic speaker. Hovering behind are a young boy and girl tending first-aid upon a Cocker Spaniel puppy. Adjacent: Mr Redford on the rack, stretched to the point of misery between Church and World, unable to serve two masters.
  For colour décor the U.S. Frequency Allocation chart is splayed beneath the “Whatever” dude douchebag masque. An honourary gonfalon respecting Grand Praetor Zarg/Xarg is flanked by Hawaiian and Nigerian flags. Next, a diptych: plastic American flag boosted from BBACBL politicos (who are equally plastic); and, a Russian S.S.R. flag, bought in the superior free market, ignoring rotten rubles.
  The imperial dartboard hangs on the door, analogue in nature, uneven sectors bait variable targeting. Light switch Tokyo smoker and a Courier One service portrayal. Shelving of linguistic literature and a tropical crèche with added African carvings, plastic dinosaurs, and mermaids.
  Mahaadev hovers o’er the bunk; turning the corner, a window facing east, catching the sunset reflections of the hotel facing west. More shelves groaning under the weight of aging vinyl. Logan’s school portrait surrounded by a totem and 3-D lenticular manifestation of Urutoraman.
  “Tiểu Vương Hội” mumbles the poster from a mid-90’s after-hours Buford Highway karaoke bar. A questionable Nihon kite from Epcot hangs beside it.
  More shelves caked with books on shop talk. Bookends: A phrenology bust on one side; a bust of the blue-eyed Injun of the Papal Lodge on the other.
  The 360-degree tour of the quarters is concluded.

Obvious Warning

Uni-Ville “Not Courier One”

Protective guise used by Courier One during covert ops for Orville’s Hertwall Codicil. This cover was also utilised during righ-risk assignments for APF.
This particular Image-Construct is intended to deceive the adversary and not oneself.

El Sueño Vano III: En su Propia Carne

Al otro lado del horizonte ondulante
La carne y la sangre bien podrían ser hueso y arena
El oasis es peor que el espejismo

El Sueño Vano I
El Sueño Vano II

Retro Tech: Tactical Psionic Devices of the Early Strata

Back in the heady days of yore before the rise and fall of the BubbaCabal, Tactical Psionic Devices were even more primitive than what we take for granted today.
  Strata IX-XI were the days before TPD’s were equipped with Sheva brainwave sensors, so basic ghee-factor Psi-Scan modules were still commonplace hardware in most Remote Pungeoning Consoles at the time.
  In addition to featuring Psi-Scan modules, early TPD’s like the Model 311 featured Random Caste Allocators and Egotic Excisors for cases of Ego Ennui. Psychic Detrusor modules were also a popular add-on option.
  KT Leaguers and other technocrats would often utilise the devices against khoogs and Pink Boys in addition to the usual defensive memetics they deployed. [Un]fortunately, they ceased using the TPD-311 after careless misuse rendered clench members pungled with frontal lobe issues sometime after the first Vindaloo Weekend.
  The Orville Corporation made definite improvements in safety and high fidelity functions and released the improved “Land Mind” model TPD introduced during the Rev. Resbo Era [Strata XIX-XXVII].

Retro Tech: Pungeoniser Imperial XI

Amongst the popular late 20th Century utilities in use in the reprogramming community was the Orville brand Pungeoniser Imperial XI model.
  Certain pungeoning techniques like the Psy-Truncheon, the Inanimate Pungle and Quantum Blur were done at the touch of a button with split-second accuracy.
  The balance of efficacy and ease of abuser-interface made the appliance popular outside of clinical pungeonary settings.
  Although the Pungeoniser Imperial XI was in favour with the public, the Kar-Lac Mishap of Stratum III led to further improvements and newer models.

Menko 21: Talibuzz

Assemblée Gnathique III

Assemblée Gnathique II

Assemblée Gnathique I

Vindaloo Weekend 8:Mardaana Manoeuvres

Byo-Byo Originale

Byo-Byo Originale — A favourite concoction by Scarlatti’s mum given for afters.
  This is the goblet and Byo-Byo is the content, man.
  After a long day in the sandbox, Scarlatti and his associates’ interoception modules became activated with the hunger signal:
“It’s Feeding Time!”
  Of course, they had to clean their plates for the privilege of the sweets thereafter.
  The taste was such a hit that word got around and the treat was eventually bought out by the Orville Corporation’s Foods Division.

Orville Introduces ‘Red’ Variety Praise™ Food Substitute

The Orville Corporation, which sells Praise™, the “New Food Substitute,” is adding a rich red to its palette of nutriments. The company unveiled Praise™ Red™ this week, just in time for fall.
  Since Orville introduced original Praise™ to the international marketplace in 2021, the company has sold more than 25 million units of the foodstuff.
  “Based on the success of the original product, Orville expects the new colour to provide a boost to all sales,” said Orville spokesperson Tayna Van Wey.
  “The research and genesis behind this concept was 100 percent focused on the kids. As parents know, it’s difficult to keep them entertained.”
  Orville asked children for ideas on how to make food substitutes more fun. Not surprisingly, they suggested a fun colour and flavour.
  “Red flavour” was the top choice amongst five-year-olds. Orville may switch to blue later on “to keep the idea fresh,” Van Wey said.
  Praise™ Red™ is a strong product for Orville because it keeps young consumers’ tastes in mind, Van Wey said.
  Orville said the product tested well with focus mums, with over half of them saying they would make their kids eat it.
  Ideally, Van Wey said, every household will buy two units of Praise™ — a ‘safe’ one for adults and a radical red one for the kids.
  “It’s not mum and dad’s food substitute,” she said. “If parents think it’s a little weird, that’s all the better for the kids. And for Orville.”

A Binding Bride is New to Town

Trichonephila clavata

Menko 21: Adversus Muxumsa

Praise™ Aerosol Nutriment Continues Uphill Battle Overseas

The Orville Corporation remains steadfast in pushing ahead their overseas campaign for Praise™ Aerosol Nutriment in the face of growing criticism.
  “Critics have always had their ‘elf and safety’ gripes,” says CEO Johnny Gutts, “but our distribution complies with all applicable laws and regs.”
  Gutts does not mince words.
  “Because of these ponces and their ‘world trade’ racket, Orville is forced to limit our overseas shipping of Praise™ to Caribbean slums, the Mideast, and despotic African ****holes — no offence, UAP!”
  Orville is no stranger to controversy, as their Therianthropic Therapeutics services (recombinant DNA salons) were forced to relocate overseas in 2014, as well as many of their forays in neurohacking and certain Punge Procedurals.
  Piracy and smuggling of Praise™ and other Orville products also continues to be a concern for the trans-global corporation. Gutts doesn’t rule out taking harsher measures in response.
  “The Burcad Badeed of the seas and the Almuharibin of the sands indeed know a good thing. Still though, gonna have to call the Allied Pungeoning Front to deal with these international incidents. Gotten our hands dirty before — not afraid to do it again.”

Menko 21: Perplessità Oggi

Perplesso Spontanea: New for Stratum XLVIII

Cue for the Flavours: Assortment δ

“Remember that time we were all at that restaurant and Chief ordered pink lemonade? Everyone just looked at him like ‘WTF?’ and he cringed and just muttered, ‘Jeezus…’”

House Brand Grape Soda: This is the can, man. Another essence (along with the attendant Wurzelbier and Birkenbier) hearkens back to the waning summer weekend at Lac des Cloches.

And speaking of grape, ‘The Gardener’ would enjoy Traubensaft with old Mrs Corbett on her porch as they both wondered about the fortuities of life. When he returned and was notified that she had passed away, he asked, “Was she a hunnert years old?” to which her son replied, “Yes.”

Blade Sharp II

Blade Sharp II, like the original Blade Sharp, is a process available at Tawmy’s Men’s Styles, with Shavo options available.

Other produkt available:
• Pèi’ǒu Style for Men
• Freedom-Do™
• Hihi In’nō Beauty Product

Menko 21: Gekido Nanashi