Tuesday, January 07, 2020

Secret Star of Sunday’s Grill-Out 2020

Re-enactment of Stratum IV make-play beneath the willows...
BBQ brushes trace glyphs in the gray dust...
Olkiewicz freak-out in the dirt behind the aircon unit...
Marge is not impressed... Tears are shed...

  There comes a time when everyone must put their money, or in this case, their strength of character where their mouth is. And we’re about to do so.
  Going that extra mile is not too much to ask when it comes to a Grill-Out. Believe in the essentials, honesty, and hard work.
  We encourage you to think about what you want. The decision one makes is so important and you must live with it.

  Once again the challenge was accepted with vigour, and the rich smoke billowed upward from the green.

Saturday, January 04, 2020

Orville Corporation Standard Application Rejection Postcard

Dear Mr Jared Gutts,

Thank you for your interest in joining the Orville team.

We wanted to let you know that although your CV was quite competitive, our hiring team reviewed your application and did not choose it for further consideration. We’re looking for candidates with slightly more experience in all available positions.

Some notes regarding your application:

• Listing “Mr. H‘s Piano Bar & Aquarium Supply” as a former place of work was unwise, as knowledge of its recent unfortunate drug scandal was made widespread by local news coverage.

• “Baxteritis” and other Baxter Street misfortunes are not considered valid disabilities by the EEOC.

• “Hire me ‘cuz my uncle is the CEO” is not necessarily a persuasive point, regardless of whether the person is being used as a reference or not. (Note: he is not.)

• Regarding the above, avoid using as a reference: family members, your “really chill sensei,” and any CraigsList “feedback.”

We wish you all the best in your job search and future endeavours.


Charmaine Hugoe
Recruiting Department Sub-Manager

Sunday, December 29, 2019

Le Gazomètre Mecoponaca 2

The past’s future dissolves to the present... to show what paints this Vomick Fever Dream — Le Gazomètre Mecoponaca...

  A third real-life instance that’s triggered the memory of a frequent but oft-forgotten dream fragment.
  The common motif threading between dream and reality: being delineated upon the most basic schema of the conscious mind’s orientation — deportment of the physical in spatial dimensions.

Friday, December 27, 2019

Le Gazomètre Mecoponaca

The fields at Eagle Road beckon...

  As the green Plymouth disembarks from the M-Tug, young eyes curiously gaze upward at the looming mystery structures, trying to make sense of them. Furley youngsters pepper Courier One with questions:
  “Is Grandma in there?”
  “Is that where Grandma is?”
  “Are we almost there?”

  But Courier One merely presses on, away from the industrial waterfront into the Chesco countryside.
  It’s just as well that Grandma was not there at
le Gazomètre Mecoponaca — as it eventually became a Superfund toxic site.

Meanwhile, Bunky and the Kinsmen await at Eagle Road...